Why I Fell in Love With Man with a Daughter

A major part of my life is the fact that I am a mom, and a step-mom. While being a mom is a big part of my life, it is not ALL that I am and I never really imagined I’d be 24 with three kids. Before meeting Martin my fridge was only stocked with wine and my daily responsibilities including making sure I didn’t forget to feed my dogs. Why, did I decide to go from only worrying about myself to having a family? Well, this post is about how my life completely change and it’s all because I fell in love with a man with a daughter.

Never in my life would I have ever imagined I would date someone with a child, let alone end up marrying them. My history with relationships was not great, and no one I had ever been serious with had kids. I wasn’t ever sure if I wanted to be a mom and I used to think it would not happen until I was much older if I decided to. All of this changed after I met Martin, my now husband. Here’s our modern day love story.

It all started with a Snapchat I had “accidentally” sent to him. Not knowing anything about each other, Martin and I really spent time building a friendship and I learned a lot about him.. Martin had been married, had a daughter, and was living with his mom, but despite all the potential red flags I saw something was different about him. At that time I had no intention of a future with him and for once in my life I had decided to just go with the flow. Martin was going through a divorce and he made it clear he never wanted to get married again. I was so young and naive marriage was not initially a thought in my mind, but that quickly changed too. When I met Martin he was really a different man and I feel like I watched him transform. Over time he did a lot of healing and I was growing myself. I began to see peace in his company, and I really believe he found peace in me too.

I don’t think any of my friends or family loved the idea of me having a relationship with Martin. No one could see why I would want a future with him, but there were so many reasons. Since Martin already had a daughter, from day one I got to see how great of a dad he was. All of a sudden the ideas of having a child became more intriguing to me. Martin showed me how much he loved Aleah, and it made me love him. I am known for being a realistic person, and Martin is very optimistic. He sees so much good in the world and in people. This also leads to him being selfless, and if you know him he literally will give the shirt off his back. I started to fall and it all happened so fast there was no way I could catch myself. They say when you know you know, but all that I knew was that I was head over heels. Despite the fact no one really supported me pursing a relationship with Martin, it almost made it like this was some forbidden love and well going against the grain is just what I like to do.

Happily Ever After…… or something like that.

Like I said, I knew I was in love but I had no idea what was yet to come. I had all these ideas of becoming a wife and a mom, but did I actually have a clue what I was getting into? The answer is absolutely not. Even today, I’m figuring it out. I have two kids under two, a step-daughter, anxiety, postpartum-depression, and the normal life stressors. I have realized a lot of challenges since becoming a mom, and especially a stepmom. Martin is a great man, loving husband, and an amazing dad, and without his support I don’t think I could handle all of these things. I created this blog to share my struggles and offer support to others who can relate to me. I made the decision to be a stepmom, become a mom, and a wife. Although the day to day has its different obstacles and stressors I wouldn’t want it any differently. I fell in love and now I’m “here.” If you are someone who is also “here” stay tuned as I share my journey and reflect on it every Friday!